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the “let them” theory - by lina - The Science of Being

softperception.substack.com · 347 words · saved by 1 readers

if they treat you like shit, let them. not because it doesn’t hurt, but for the fact that trying to control the behaviour of people who have already made a habit of hurting you is an endless trap. you’ll waste hours, days, years explaining the same thing in different fonts, thinking if you can just phrase it right, they’ll finally understand. they won’t. they are not incapable of understanding, but they are also not interested in changing. people don’t change being given enough clarity. they change through choice. and if someone’s already decided that your comfort is optional, your hurt negotiable, your needs inconvenient, believe them. the hardest pill to swallow is that sometimes people just don’t care as much as you do. and no amount of loyalty or empathy on your part is going to change that equation. you can’t save someone who isn’t drowning. they’re just watching you flail from the shore, calling it a connection. you think you’re being patient. kind. emotionally generous. but half

if they treat you like shit, let them. trying to control the behaviour of people who have already made a habit of hurting you is an endless trap. you will waste hours, days, years explaining the same thing in different ways, thinking if you can phrase it just right they will finally understand. mostly likely however, they won’t. many people are not incapable of understanding , they don’t change given enough clarity. it is a choice. simply put, they are just not interested in changing. and if someone’s already decided that your hurt negotiable and your needs inconvenient, believe them. the…

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