i don't know how to be loved without earning it - by harls

the transactional nature of love

tell me i’m useful. i don’t know how to be loved unless i’m useful. unless i’ve done something that really truly makes me worthy of someone’s love. unless i’ve made their life easier, carried something heavy for them on my shoulders, fixed something in them that they deemed broken. love, to me, has always felt transactional. author’s note: a second part to this post is now published. you can read it here: i learnt this from a young age. love always seemed to come after the praise, the good grades, after being quiet after i was told to be “seen and not heard”, after putting every single…

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• Ashna Nirula

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