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Self-Silencing Is Making Women Sick | Time

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For women, being more disappointing could be a lifesaver, writes Maytal Eyal.

“Be more disappointing” is not a piece of advice most people would pay money to hear, but in my therapy office, it’s often the most valuable guidance I can give. My clients are mostly women, and nearly all of them struggle with a fear of disappointing others. Our culture rewards women for being perpetually pleasant, self-sacrificing, and emotionally in control, and it can feel counterintuitive for my clients to say “no”—or firmly assert their wants and needs. But my work is about helping them realize that their health might literally depend on it. Today, women account for almost 80% of autoimm

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