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The truth about most men - by Piers Eccleston

pierseccleston.substack.com · 2,916 words · saved by 1 readers

The Love Gap aims to explore overlooked truths between men and women to rebuild understanding and mutual respect. One truth is that we men don’t explain ourselves very well. So here goes. The Love Gap is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. Freud may not have known what women want. But what most men want is to be useful, ideally to a woman. While there are plenty of male scumbags, they are a tiny minority that give all men a bad name. Forget them for now. We’ll deal with the scumbags in a later post. I’m talking here about the other 95% of ordinary, good men that most of us are lucky enough to have in our lives. Maybe for you, it’s your father, your brother, friends or sons. If you have a husband, hopefully he’s a good man. Good men play for points. Points mean worth, value and the opportunity to be cherished. Even when men get it wrong, their intention is to provide and be of useful service. In fact, the

The truth about most men Inside every good man is a burning desire to be useful. Piers Eccleston Jun 09, 2024 2,522 487 416 Share Editor’s note (added 2026): I’m grateful to the many readers and commenters who engaged with this piece so thoughtfully — especially those who pointed out what I failed to make explicit around attachment. Re-reading it, I can see how parts of the original wording might be misread as endorsing codependency or a transactional “earn love through service” dynamic, which was never my intention. In that spirit, I’ve added this note (and finessed a few lines below) to unde

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