flâneur

ephemerality - by Claire Wang - cold brew blog

clairebookworm.substack.com · 1,282 words · saved by 2 readers

My top song in 2023 was all things end by hozier, which is fitting, because it was a year of endings and goodbyes, of having one too many hugs that felt like the last, and coming to terms that I’d somehow, reluctantly, arrived at the “real world.” There’s something deeply painful about saying goodbye to someone you think you will never see again. You can grab on to the concept of a future reunion, the idea that you’ll keep in contact over text, that “it’s a see you later not a goodbye” but what hurts is, once you’ve said enough of these goodbyes–in-denial, your heart figures out it isn’t real. Recently, I’ve been spending a lot more time alone and being forced to be intentional when asking to hang out with friends. (And, writing a post about how to be alone has not helped my own loneliness problem.) While I still find it deeply difficult to exist on my own and find joy in doing things alone, I think it’s taught me how to say goodbye and how to accept that nothing is permanent. Goodbyes

My top song in 2023 was all things end by hozier, which is fitting, because it was a year of endings and goodbyes, of having one too many hugs that felt like the last, and coming to terms that I’d somehow, reluctantly, arrived at the “real world.” There’s something deeply painful about saying goodbye to someone you think you will never see again. You can grab on to the concept of a future reunion, the idea that you’ll keep in contact over text, that “it’s a see you later not a goodbye” but what hurts is, once you’ve said enough of these goodbyes–in-denial, your heart figures out it isn’t…

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