I Am Not Enjoying Motherhood - Morgan Hoog

One year postpartum, rage, impermanence, and the grief that follows devotion.

Note/ trigger warning: This is a personal essay about motherhood as it is lived, not as it is idealized. It contains frank descriptions of postpartum anger, sorrow, and anxiety. I am well-supported and safe. I am not enjoying motherhood. Or, at least, I am not enjoying motherhood in the way I once believed I would. On a recent family vacation, everyone around me became suspended in a tableau of leisure: their wine poured without urgency, their paperbacks softening in the sun, their coffee enjoyed hot. I watched them move through the day as if the world was still theirs to inhabit, while I…

saved by

• Jaclyn
• Derek Yen
• Arielle Lok
• Khushi Wadhwa

related reading

• Having Kidspaulgraham.com
• Motherhood is not the end of an intellectual lifevictoriahebbert.substack.com
• On Being a Dad - Derek Thompsonderekthompson.org
• The discomfort of intimacybitsofwonder.substack.com
• Mediumsariazout.medium.com
• these are the days - by Lilian - beauty and terrorliliancaylee.substack.com
• things you'll miss when you become a motherliliancaylee.substack.com
• ode to the mets | arielle lokariellelok.com
• 10 Thoughts from the Fourth Trimester — Wait But Whywaitbutwhy.com
• ambition and kidstiffchat.substack.com
• Having Kidspaulgraham.com
• I regret following the Asian tradition of 'sitting the month' after my baby was born - Today's Parenttodaysparent.com