Jae Park

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I took an unexpected gap year last year. I moved down to Palo Alto, and worked at a startup. As a result, the friends I grew up with in Toronto for 8+ years were left behind, and I was living alone for a while. On the bright side, it gave me lots of time to reflect on my friendships, both past and present. I came to realize a few things which I'd like to share. If you are a friend to everyone you are an enemy to yourself. As humans, our goals and values change all the time. This is normal, as you experience life you should be growing wiser and more tuned to your purpose (handwavy term), whatever that may be. This is growth. In any friendship, friends put each other in mental boxes. Boxes that outline each other's expected behaviours, preferences, and identity. But more consequently, boxes which determine a hierarchal order with respect to oneself. When you grow and change, you disrupt the mental boxes your friends have put you in. And sometimes, it makes your friends feel threatened, b

Outgrowing Friends I took a gap year last year. The rationale behind this deserves its own post, but I was consequently living in Palo Alto for a while. It meant leaving behind my friends I grew up with in Toronto for 8+ years and living alone in a city far from home for the first time. It also gave me time to reflect on my friendships, both past and present. I came to realize a few things which I'd like to share. If you are a friend to everyone you are an enemy to yourself. I believe that in any friendship, friends put each other inside static mental boxes. These boxes outline what we…

Jae Park

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