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in defence of yearning - by maja - velvet noise

velvetnoise.substack.com · 1,164 words · saved by 1 readers

I’ve noticed a strange hostility to yearning lately. Reels tell us longing is wasted energy, projection, a distraction from our “real” lives. Memes follow suit, mocking desire into silence. “Simping” is the most telling, an insult that has likely kept more people from loving fully than it has ever safeguarded. The word grates because of what it collapses: care, devotion, tenderness, enthusiasm, all recoded as weakness. We call it “simping” or “cringe,” and suddenly the gestures that make connection possible are treated as shameful. These cultural scripts shrink us, rather than expand us. What we need are counter-memes, new signals that say it is safe again to want, to risk, to reveal the pulse of affection without apology. It’s strange that yearning, one of the most basic forces of being human, has become countercultural. That to want openly is now seen as naïve, inefficient, or embarrassing. This is the world I’m writing against. My earlier essay, The Intelligence of Desire, sketched

in defence of yearning why desire is an act of resistance in an age of numbness maja Aug 27, 2025 4,402 98 1,198 Share Patrick Bruel, movie: Une vie à t'attendre (I`ve Been Waiting So Long) I’ve noticed a pervasive hostility to yearning lately. Reels tell us longing is wasted energy, projection, a distraction from our “real” lives. Memes follow suit, mocking desire into silence. “Simping” is the most telling, an insult that has likely kept more people from loving fully than it has ever safeguarded. The word grates because of what it collapses: care, devotion, tenderness, enthusiasm, all recode

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