original sin - by Ava - bookbear express

Sometimes I tally up my recent bad behavior in my head. Many of the sins are pretty small—I’m terrible at responding to messages, for instance. I have no object permanence and misplace my phone approximately 18 times a day. I would like to not drink at all but I still use a glass of wine to unravel myself at the end of a day. Others are deeper, more structural—I can be very removed, unemotional about things that matter to me. I hurt people with my ambivalence. My relationships with men contain problem within problem with problem—it’s kind of a matryoshka doll type of situation. I’m not proud of these weaknesses.

Sometimes I tally up my recent bad behavior in my head. Many of the sins are pretty small—I’m terrible at responding to messages, for instance. I have no object permanence and misplace my phone approximately 18 times a day. I would like to not drink at all but I still use a glass of wine to unravel myself at the end of a day. Others are deeper, more structural—I can be very removed, unemotional about things that matter to me. I hurt people with my ambivalence. My relationships with men contain problem within problem with problem—it’s kind of a matryoshka doll type of situation. I’m not proud o