i always wanted to grow up, until i slowly started becoming one | by klywrites | May, 2024 | Medium

I’ve always been a dreamer since I was a kid. I always had those fancy fantasies about my life for the next few years. I always expected something and felt like something was waiting for me. I thought about growing up as a dream. But now that I’m nearing it, I dream of being a child again. I thought when I reached eighteen, I could finally be free and do anything without restrictions. When I reached adulthood, I could be anywhere I wanted. I would finally be out of my cage and find the value of my wings. My childhood days were filled with tears and cold sweats, loneliness and darkness. It was the kind of childhood I wish I could change if given a chance. This is the reason why I kept looking forward to my adult years. Perhaps there, I could have the things I lost as a kid. Perhaps there, it would be different. I would be different. And now in my sixteenth year, I start to fear the next few years. Two years before I turn eighteen. Two years before college. The age I’ve been waiting for.

I’ve always been a dreamer since I was a kid. I always had those fancy fantasies about my life for the next few years. I always expected something and felt like something was waiting for me. I thought about growing up as a dream. But now that I’m nearing it, I dream of being a child again. I thought when I reached eighteen, I could finally be free and do anything without restrictions. When I reached adulthood, I could be anywhere I wanted. I would finally be out of my cage and find the value of my wings. My childhood days were filled with tears and cold sweats, loneliness and darkness. It was