'My Dad Died Unexpectedly And I Can't Get Over It!'
This column first ran in April of 2014 in The Awl, and was republished in my 2016 book How to Be a Person in the World. Last week, Vaani Mahesh and Vaibhav Munjal discussed it on their book podcast VM Square — or should I say, they analyzed it line by line! So I wanted to rerun the column and share a link to their discussion, which is such a pure example of surrendering to vulnerability and sadness in ways that make you feel more alive. Hi Polly. Last year my father, who was 56, died suddenly of a heart aneurysm. He took me out for my 24th birthday dinner, and then two days later he was dead. I feel like the past months have been a mess of every emotion possible. I’m a great big ball of pain, and it seems as though grief is the one thing no one will talk about with me. My dad was the parent who showed up for me, who supported me as a writer. We shared so many similarities: a tendency to overthink and undersleep, a need for long intellectual conversations, a deep and sometimes painful s
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