“Circus behavior, and everybody is monkey, monkey, monkey, clown.”

I used to want to be a part of the media party circuit so bad. As a young person aspiring to be a writer, I would zoom into certain Instagram Stories of interest, wondering how everyone there got to go. Now, as a person attending them, I am pissed off! I was lied to. Bamboozled. Swindled. Hoodwinked like a young maiden in the depths of a dark forest. These things are not fun at all! And it is primarily because you people do not know how to put your boots on the ground and serve cunt. To begin, what’s with this city’s devotion to hors d’oeuvres? Either serve a full meal, or stop inviting us all out at 6:30 pm. That is sacred time to be eating an entire bowl of vegetables on your couch, in your sweatpants. I spend most of my time at these things trying to chase down the poor servers so I can eat enough deconstructed summer roll bites that promise to eventually make one whole summer roll. But what really makes my breasts ache with rage is the way you people (you, who care about your caree

I used to want to be a part of the media party circuit so bad. As a young person aspiring to be a writer, I would zoom into certain Instagram Stories of interest, wondering how everyone there got to go. Now, as a person attending them, I am pissed off! I was lied to. Bamboozled. Swindled. Hoodwinked like a young maiden in the depths of a dark forest. These things are not fun at all! And it is primarily because you people do not know how to put your boots on the ground and serve cunt. To begin, what’s with this city’s devotion to hors d’oeuvres? Either serve a full meal, or stop inviting us all