The problem of long-term close friendships - by Kasra

There was a point a year and a half ago when I felt I had found a community that would last forever. One best friend in the West Village, another best friend in the Upper East, an apartment with roommates that I loved coming home to. I wrote at the time, “I yearn for best friends that I’ll still be best friends with in 30 years.” I was convinced that this must be possible because I had read the book A Little Life which follows a group of best friends from college until old age. Until that point I don’t think I had ever imagined—in that much detail—what it would be like to grow old with your friends, but I decided it was something I absolutely wanted. A year and a half later, this vision seems harder than ever. One best friend is in a relationship and is leaving the city soon, another best friend has become harder to reach; the roommates are still there but one of them is moving out soon too. Everyone is always moving somewhere new, dating someone new, working somewhere new. People talk

There was a point a year and a half ago when I felt I had found a community that would last forever. One best friend in the West Village, another best friend in the Upper East, an apartment with roommates that I loved coming home to. I wrote at the time, “I yearn for best friends that I’ll still be best friends with in 30 years.” I was convinced that this must be possible because I had read the book A Little Life which follows a group of best friends from college until old age. Until that point I don’t think I had ever imagined—in that much detail—what it would be like to grow old with your fr