Your boundaries set you free - by Brian Stout

How can I take the right amount of responsibility? What is mine to do? What is not mine? How do I know the difference? I feel pulled in opposing directions. On the one hand, I come from a family of lawyers and competed for years in speech and debate: I am a master at deploying logic and marshalling arguments to rationalize my behavior and thus avoid responsibility. My work here is to take more responsibility, to combat my tendency to justify my actions. On the other hand, I have a tendency to take responsibility for things that I am not responsible for. In particular, I have a tendency to take responsibility for other people's emotions: when others are distressed I feel it is my responsibility to help them feel better, or to take responsibility for being the cause of their distress. My work here is to take less responsibility, to own what is mine but no more. It's a really difficult practice, and I don't always have a good sense of how far across the bridge I need to walk; what is my j

How can I take the right amount of responsibility? What is mine to do? What is not mine? How do I know the difference? I feel pulled in opposing directions. On the one hand, I come from a family of lawyers and competed for years in speech and debate: I am a master at deploying logic and marshalling arguments to rationalize my behavior and thus avoid responsibility. My work here is to take more responsibility, to combat my tendency to justify my actions. On the other hand, I have a tendency to take responsibility for things that I am not responsible for. In particular, I have a tendency to take