Erasure: A Subtle and Too-Often Accepted Form of Domestic Violence | by TDO Timothy | ILLUMINATION-Curated | Medium

We like to believe that maturity — often defined as the culmination of aging, level of education, and experience —is in itself a defense against abuse and our tendency to abuse others. This is only because we complicate the simplicity of abuse, which simply means to misuse or abnormally use (ab- + use) someone else. This calls into question, of course, what relationships between people are actually supposed to be. Each person must ask him or herself: “When I interact with people, in what kinds of ways do I put them to use in my life” or “How do I use people?” You must ask yourself, “When I interact with people, in what kinds of ways do I put them to use in my life” or “How do I use people?” I know that you feel uncomfortable asking yourself how you use people because — unfortunately — we have also complicated the meaning of use when it comes to each other. Culturally, we have defined relational use negatively and used it to label abusers in this way: “I don’t get involved with users”…

We like to believe that maturity — often defined as the culmination of aging, level of education, and experience —is in itself a defense against abuse and our tendency to abuse others. This is only because we complicate the simplicity of abuse, which simply means to misuse or abnormally use (ab- + use) someone else. This calls into question, of course, what relationships between people are actually supposed to be. Each person must ask him or herself: “When I interact with people, in what kinds of ways do I put them to use in my life” or “How do I use people?” You must ask yourself, “When I int