The Craziest Thing That Ever Happened to Me, or, Existential Kink and My Shadow

I feel awkward about writing this, because the truth is that if someone else had written it, I wouldn’t believe anything they said. I’m generally a guy who doesn’t believe in magic or magical-seeming things. I’m a mechanistically-minded person. I certainly do not believe, in general, that people can achieve instant global changes in their consciousness through reading weirdly-titled spiritual self-help books written in a funky feminine vernacular. But here I am, with a task I do not relish. Realism is not the order of the day. I’m writing to you about how I did one meditation exercise from a book called Existential Kink and permanently altered my subjectivity. I can't say it any plainer. It feels like sorcery. It actually was sorcery—indistinguishable from a wizard snapping his fingers. My world shifted instantly, for the better. I hope that you, unlike my hypothetical alternate-world self, can believe me. Because you should take this seriously. If there’s a 1% chance that you can achi

I feel awkward about writing this, because the truth is that if someone else had written it, I wouldn’t believe anything they said. I’m generally a guy who doesn’t believe in magic or magical-seeming things. I’m a mechanistically-minded person. I certainly do not believe, in general, that people can achieve instant global changes in their consciousness through reading weirdly-titled spiritual self-help books written in a funky feminine vernacular. But here I am, with a task I do not relish. Realism is not the order of the day. I’m writing to you about how I did one meditation exercise from a b