nancy zuo

i realize how much i’ve chased things for prestige without sight of what i might be curious about and what i enjoy doing outside the context of it granting validation from others. the college i go to, the work i do, the way i gain measurable trust in others had been so tied to credentials. when extracting the prestige from my identity, i’m really not sure who i am or what I want. outside the context of what i have done, i have no idea how to distinguish supporting my curiosities versus my ego. i realize i found trouble in even starting normal conversations with others without feeling a need to retreat to traditionally 'safe' questions like "what college do you go to" or "what do you do?" i would find it especially hard to talk to older people because i would not know how to dive deeper and get someone to share something new rather than spit out information that they've probably repeated over and over with every introduction. for what i lacked in curiosity, i made up with self-proclaime

i realize how much i’ve chased things for prestige without sight of what i might be curious about and what i enjoy doing outside the context of it granting validation from others. the college i go to, the work i do, the way i gain measurable trust in others had been so tied to credentials. when extracting the prestige from my identity, i’m really not sure who i am or what I want. outside the context of what i have done, i have no idea how to distinguish supporting my curiosities versus my ego. i realize i found trouble in even starting normal conversations with others without feeling a need to