Polyamory doesn't Liberate; Monogamy doesn't Protect

Live your life your way, and enter into any sort of consensual relationship you want. This essay is not a prescription — just a call to be conscious, and look at the big picture. I remember when I first heard about the concept of Polyamory. Having grown up in Utah, Polygamy was the butt of many jokes, but the idea of having multiple partners was 100% off the radar. My high school peers were a mixture of Mormon and ABC (American-born Chinese) kids, and neither group is known for their teenage promiscuity. I moved to California for college in 2009 — the land of free love — although at this point polyamory was still very counter-cultural. I think I was a sophomore when my friend Carlos (a super-senior with nose rings and glorious purple dyed hair) explained his polyamorous relationship to me. “We just have the perspective that we don’t own each other. Monogamy is kind of messed-up. Why should I get to decide what my partner can or can’t do, right?”1 I was generally pretty open-minded, and

Live your life your way, and enter into any sort of consensual relationship you want. This essay is not a prescription — just a call to be conscious, and look at the big picture. I remember when I first heard about the concept of Polyamory. Having grown up in Utah, Polygamy was the butt of many jokes, but the idea of having multiple partners was 100% off the radar. My high school peers were a mixture of Mormon and ABC (American-born Chinese) kids, and neither group is known for their teenage promiscuity. I moved to California for college in 2009 — the land of free love — although at this point